I let myself sleep in and embarked on "me day" with a late start. The sun was shining brightly outside and my heart felt the slightest bit of warmth despite my previous onset of "internal cloudy days". I climbed out of bed and got dressed in the most comfortable outfit that hugged my body ever so gently. By now it had been lunch time and for the first time in a long time I encouraged myself to eat at a restaurant alone. So with my book and purse in hand, I stepped out the door to welcome the rest of "me day".
Lunch consisted of yummy pan fried pork buns with a side of sweet soy milk. Asian dishes like these often give me a sense of comfort and that day it didn't fail either. As I flipped through the pages of my "feel good" book and indulged in my simple lunch I felt a sense of peacefulness, in the stillness of my rediscovered autonomy.
Following lunch I drove to the nearest coffee joint and sat down with a nice cup of brew and just read. A few hours went by and still ... I felt a sense of peacefulness.
As the rays of sunshine peaked through strands of my hair they lit up the pages I read, and warmed my heart a bit more. I stood up from the couch and walked out of the coffee shop with a breezy calmness.
I found myself sitting in central park awhile later, fully letting the sun embrace my body, every inch of it, and indulged in the moment for it made me feel whole, and it gave me love. In that moment, I felt fulfillment. It felt familiar, yet foreign, but it felt so good that I became teary eyed. I look around and just let this moment sink in. The sun, the green grass, shady trees with children running underneath, the children's laughter... All of this was so beautiful to me. I took a deep breath in and told myself that this, was love.
Suddenly, I realized that I was smiling...
Even though a day like this happens very rarely for me in my current state, on the rare occasion that it does take place, I'm reminded of how beautiful and amazing life really is. And that if we just allow ourselves to experience it this way more often, heart hearts could be that much fuller.